Lovin' The Giaour: A Vathek Fan Fiction
by Stevie the Ice Queen
Summary: See Author's Note


_Author's Note: William Beckford's _Vathek_ is easily one of the most highly underrepresented works of fiction in the fan fiction community. I think this is absolutely deplorable. If any work deserves fan fiction, it's this one. Anyway, this is a bit of a crack fic focusing on the relationships between Carathis and the Giaour and the Giaour and the Genie. Currently, this is the only chapter, but I'll post more if people request it. If you haven't read Vathek, you can read the whole thing online here:_ .

She knew that he was dangerous. What else could he be? A man promising treasure in exchange for unwavering obedience couldn't possibly be someone worth trusting. And yet, hadn't he shown proof? The treasures he brought to the kingdom were clearly not of any kind she had ever seen before.

Carathis knew her good-for-nothing son agreed. All he did was eat and whine and cry for his mama, but he knew good treasure when he saw it. After all, that was how he was raised.

What was it that attracted her to the Giaour? Was it the promise of jewels and infinite power? His mystery? His general demeanor- so quiet, so tricky, and so commanding? Or just his soft brown eyes?

Maybe it was his potential power over her so. Not as a father figure, per se, but still a good influence. Her son's temper was out of control of late. He threw his food and tantrums and slaughtered his servants (or at least their beards- best plea-bargain Carathis had ever made, if she did say so herself), and no one seemed ready to stop him anytime soon.

From the next room, she heard a yell.

"I asked for wine! Not water. Not juice. Wine!"

"But sir, this is wine. The best in the village. Our most accomplished farmer grew and harvested the finest grapes in his collection specifically for your table."

"Rid this man from my sight. Find the farmer. Both die tomorrow. Guard, go quickly before I decide to execute you, too."

There was a pause.

"I want my WIIIIIIINE!"

Carathis reflected for a moment. No, Vathek definitely needed a father figure. Where had that Giaour gone, anyway?

The Giaour looked down to the bottom of the cliff.

"What are you doing here?"

The Genie lifted himself out of the crevice. Having extremely large and muscular arms made this seem easy. It was either this, or his ability to fly.

"Why haven't you called me, Giaour?"

"How would I call you? How would I reach you? Yelling your name off the roof of the tallest building might just draw the Caliph's attention, you know."

"As if you don't want their attention. I've seen your treasures and your faux mysterious facade."

"Is that what we're calling them these days?"

The Genie paused.

"You should have stayed in Eblis."

"Go away. The children actually have to die this time."

"As if it matters. I've seen these people. They don't need to be any more evil. They've well deserved their trip to Eblis."

"I think you're wrong."

"Well, they're evil enough. Especially that mother. The Caliph is a spoiled brat, but Carathis has no reason not to know better."

The Giaour smiled.

"Oh, she'll know something, all right."

The Genie grew sour. Sour at the Giaour.

"Stay away from the children. They're mine. They could have been yours, if you weren't an ass."

"Get over your jealousy. It's boring."

"I'm leaving."

"Good."

And the Genie sunk back into the canyon.

Vathek sat alone, surrounded by sweets and thinking about love. All of the servants seemed to be in love, and all of the townspeople coupled with children. Vathek liked love. Love was good. He had also always liked the name "Nouronihar." It was a shame he would never meet a woman with that name.

Thankfully, his mother never understood love. How could she? He supposed that she loved him, but then, who didn't? He sighed to himself. Perfection could be so exhausting sometimes. Or maybe he was just thirsty. That seemed to happen a lot of late.

Carathis barged in.

"Vathek, my son!"

"Your handsome young man?"

"What?"

"Never mind."

"My son, we need to talk. You need a father figure."

"Do I?"

"Yes. You are cruel and disobedient, and you need a father to whip you into shape."

Vathek stared at his mother.

"I could have you executed, you know."

"Listen to your mother, you spoiled brat."

"Why do I need a father? You're certainly manly enough for both of us."

"Well, it just so happens that I've found you a father figure, my son."

"Who?"

Coincidentally, the Giaour swept into the room.

"Ah, there he is!" Carathis exclaimed. She gave the bewildered Giaour a gigantic bear hug (though it was called a "camel hug" in their city- no one really knew why, as camels could not really give hugs).

"Now, be good and listen to your father, Vathek," Carathis implored as she left the room, kissing both Vathek and the Giaour on the cheek before exiting.

"What is she going on about?" the Giaour asked. Vathek rolled his eyes.

"Never mind my mother. Tell me what you want."

"Well, you'll need 500 children…"


End file.
